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Overall, we would perform better in life if we constantly worked on becoming the best we could be.  Granted, this journey to becoming the best we can be never stops, until we die.  We have to constantly be growing and becoming better, or someone else will replace us in that relationship, or someone else will be given that promotion over us, or we will simply lose out on getting the best things that life has to offer us, simply because we chose to not grow.

Becoming a ‘better’ you comes in handy not only in our professional lives, but also in our personal lives, and internally, which I believe to be actually more important.  Once we are developing ourselves internally every day, learning about how we could be better people, partners, lovers, friends, etc, and we actually put what we learn into play, I believe everything else in life starts falling into place!

Now, there are many different tips out there as to how to develop into a better you!  Indeed, they are very helpful, and when practiced constantly, you see that you become happier in your everyday life! You being to know yourself better, as you become more transparent with yourself!  This tip I want to share with you will do the same for you!

TIP:  Use Negative Feedback in Becoming A BETTER YOU!

This at first may read odd, but once explained, it will make pure sense!

Let me give you an example.  Suppose you and a friend get into an argument.  As humans, it is only instinctual that during an argument, we do and say all we can to protect ourselves and our feelings.  Hearing what another may have to say about us that they don’t like, or wish we would change, isn’t an easy thing to deal with, so naturally, we may cut the person off, and use excuses and reasoning to protect ourselves, our feelings, and our egos! This not only makes the argument go on and on, but even if it stops, it can be a reoccurring one, because we refused to take the negative feedback during the argument, and use it to our advantage!

Face all negative feedback, so you know what to work on!

The best way to handle this situation is to hear your friend out!  What are all the things she is saying she feels should be different so your relationship can be better?  Why does she feel that way?  When she tells you what those things are, keep them in mind, and let her know that you value your friendship, and will work on the feedback she has given you, to ensure a stronger friendship with you.  Let her know also, if applicable, what you feel should be done differently in order to avoid a similar argument in the future.  This way, she will feel like you took time to hear her out; therefore, she will be more likely to do the same for you!

Now, some people may say all types of things in criticism of you, some that do not even make sense.  This is where you have to take some time and think about all of the things that person said, and filter through them.  In order for this to work, however, you have to be totally honest and secure with yourself.   You may want to do this when you calm, so you can think clearly.   

Ask yourself, “What did my friend point out can I truly work on to become a better person overall?” Be brutally honest with yourself!  Don’t brush the things she said off and think, “Urg. She just doesn’t understand me!”

In order to become better, we have to take the feedback, especially the negative, and use it as a tool to check off the things we need to work on in order to be the best we can!  In Jack Canfield’s The Success Principles, he suggests that we should go as far as asking for others’ feedback to help us grow!  He uses the following question:

“On a scale from 1 to 10, how would you rate me as a  … (girlfriend, writer, boss, sister, father, speaker, etc.)?”

And if the rating is a 9 or below, he asks, “What can I do better to make it a 10?”

After asking these questions, we have to be strong and secure enough to hear the good and the bad without retorting and trying to explain why you are a 4, 6, or a 9.  Just listen to the feedback, and use it to help yourself grow personally.  With this exercise and with your willingness to really be honest with yourself and use the negative feedback to mold you into a better person, your rating and the others satisfaction will definitely rise!

Companies use this strategy to ensure the satisfaction of their customers, and we can use it to become better and to build better relationships with others!

I hope this little tip was helpful!

“Be the best you!” –Josi Marie

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